02.12. November 19, 2011

alright life followers. here is a picture post produced par procrastination.

I'll walk you through it a bit.

1) I've been doing a bit of promo photography for Newtown. One of our bartenders, Bree, invented a new drink to add to our cocktail list, and I was asked to take a couple photos of the drink, the brains and beauty behind the operation and that's it. Except it wasn't. I loved shooting Bree so much that I spent about an hour taking photos of her. She's had experience modelling, she is a complete delight and very down-to-earth. It also helped that because her new drink is called Cherry-Cola, we were able to have very ambient-appropriate lighting (the whole lounge is red, purple and the lights were dim, giving a brownish-glow). 

I am admittedly awful at Photoshop/other editing software, so I prefer to just try to get the best shot possible without editing. Some of these are touched up in little bits, but for the most part it's just Bree, looking breeutiful (eww. I had to. Sorry.) 

Next, we have a couple of shots from Club Empire - the club on the basement level of Newtown. The shots are from two separate events (including the time I got to shoot Selena Gomez's after-show party!!! Don't know who she is? I didn't either. oops.)

Then we switch to a few shots of the coffee shop where I work. Random shots mostly. Actually all of them are random. There's then some autumn captured. I'm so spoiled by Montreal Autumns, apparently. The weather has been atypically warm (I have never experienced such a beautiful November). Everywhere I turned, I felt inspired and found myself bringing my camera with me even on short trips out. 

Even with such an ominous-looking sky, the colours jump out and literally left me breathless sometimes. 

I've attached a few photos of my random trip to Ottawa a month back - I can't remember if I'd already attached them, but due to severe neglect of blog, I'm attaching some of my favourites (and some of myself for good measure. [gawd. so. vain.] )

you will notice all the ones of me are rotated to the side, and I can't figure out how to straighten them out (instantaneous vain karma?)

and then all the breath-taking photos at the end of the post...those are of my apartment. I wake up in the morning and open my bedroom door onto a long hallway that ends with an East-facing window, so there's a constant stream of sunlight pouring into the apartment for about an hour. I sit and drink my espresso, close my eyes and genuinely smile. 

yes.

i'm back to smiling with my eyes.

Isn't my place beautiful? Won't you come visit? 

This is a really bland post in the sense that I don't explore any emotion, but it's important. I can't wait to have time to be creative again. I'm itching to explore something creative.

Also, I think I'm bailing on law and leaning more towards journalism. I'm so inspired right now I'm doing pliés in the hallwés.

enjoy.

a morning of god-like impressions

crunch.

dinner with my room mate! maple-whiskey infused egg-noodle tortellini with a campofiorin and avocados with herbed goat cheese and balsamic vinegar. 

i, cook.

the first from my fashion show shoot

more to come soon, I hope!

so excited to see my family at christmas! it's not too soon to start getting excited!!!

à bientôt

xox

k!

01.27. April 2, 2011

wow.

I feel like taking a few days away from my blog is

terrifying.

a lot has happened since my last post.

I guess the biggest challenge has been my Harriet the Spy moment.

Michelle Trachtenberg (currently of villainous Gossip Girl fame) played Miss Harriet the Spy back in the 90s, next to Rosie O'Donnell.

In Harriet the Spy, Michelle Trachtenberg gets her diary busted into by her whole grade three class. 

They find out all her secrets.

Fast forward to 2009-present. Michelle Trachtenberg plays the horrible, mean-spirited, gorgeous but devious 

Georgina Sparks who lies, spies and cheats. 

Need a refresher? You can watch the videos to help jog your memory.

Start at 6:50:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tUKXChkGAs

and then what cute little harriet became (0:00- 1:15):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CU5XOW6XrVU&feature=related

i was on a scary path.

I was Harriet, and well on my way to Georgina Sparks territory.

So I did what Harriet didn't:

I came clean.

fessed up

before I got caught.

The worst thing about shedding all your lies is picking up the pieces after.

number of people  friends who have opted to ditch out on me in the last year: 3 (at least)

that's the worst part. I think that I can control all these different scenarios, but I can't. 

I lie and manipulate and tell half-truths, and when that doesn't work?

i run like hell out of winnipeg.

.ugh.

but. I do feel better for it. For finally telling the truth to people about who and what I am. I wish this was a teen romance movie and I could follow up the last sentence with: "a vampire".

but it's not. i'm just an old lame scaredy cat who doesn't want to hurt people's feelings & who tries to control situations so that no one ever really knows what's going on with me.

This is terribly convoluted. 

apologies.

in short (is it too late?): telling the truth hurts and sucks. even best friends can't be expected to hang on if you are never honest with them

never tell them anything about yourself

hide things

sigh. it's a big lesson.

Nicolas and I both had an acupuncture appointment on Friday morning followed by brunch at Casa del Popolo - my favourite resto-bar in Montreal so far. We've been there before. This time was extra special because I was so down-in-the-dumps and it felt nice to talk. At the end, I asked if he thought I was a bad person. If he judged me.

he said he didn't. 

& I believed him.

& it's hard to find people who just don't judge

The acupuncture was my second appointment, and I haven't felt any huge shifts or changes, though the certified acupuncturist did tell me it may take a few appointments. He's a lovely man from France (whose accent I understand well enough to speak with him strictly in French. Which is good, because communication seems key when I have needles in my wrists, feet, chest, and head!)

I'm hoping. wishing. waiting. that this will be a significant step for me in my battle against anxiety.

I'm also muchos busy in other ways right now. First on the plate is wrapping up school (4 essays to do by April 28th)

Booking flight to Uganda with my mum and, as of today, my Kwagala partner and longest friend LEIGH!!!

SO excited. It'll be her first time even though she's been part of Kwagala from the start. So that means planning a trip in Uganda for a newbie!

Then, my mother, who knows just when "enough is enough" for me, has decided that a 10-day tour through wine country France is just what is needed for two ladies.

The $400 seat sale from Montreal-Paris return helps!

Thank Agnostic God for my Mum and her sixth sense. Anyway for a trip that includes Uganda and France, it's less than $2000 per person. How lucky am I to spend a month with two of my favourite people?

I say it often but it really is true:

the world balances out for us.

Speaking of friends and balance, a dear friend has really pulled through in the last little bit. We met in university and became instant friends - so much so that we butted heads sister-style. 

incredibly though she is someone who knows all those terrible things about me. calls me on them.

& then is still there at the end of the day for me.

it's been really nice to have her daily texts, emails, tweets.

Anyway, her world's been balanced out because she is doing this project called Project Peace, that will profile 12-15 young people doing enormous things with their lives. I love the way she puts it

"telling the stories about the people who are too humble to tell it themselves".

So by next February she will have a BOOK! and it already is shaping up to look monumental.

(I would say I'm biased because she profiled Kwagala in it, but I also know her end goal is so incredible, and her project seems so cool that I'm putting my bias aside just this once!)

Her name is Dani. To find out more about Project Peace please look up the blog at:

projectpeacecanada.wordpress.com

Also in balance's news:

I woke up with an ear infection this morning. It wasn't so much the pain that bothered me as the dizziness! I literally collided with the wall at 10:15 this morning. It was problematic timing because I'd signed up for my very first photography lesson with a beautiful Russian woman willing to take me under her wing! It was scheduled for 14:00 (so Russian) and she wasn't too impressed that I bailed only three hours before.

However, she has given me a second chance so Monday night I start my FIRST EVER PHOTOGRAPHY LESSONS!!!

So month plan:

-school & homework

-finish up the internship

-go to uganda

-go to france

-start photography lessons

-get a visit from my step mother!

-behave myself. become more whole. be the better person i want to be, even if it's scary

-take chances

-find a job

-find a kitten

-just kidding

-but not really.

This is getting impossibly long. But do you know what feels nice? Seeing how many people are looking at this site. Especially since I don't talk to many people anymore.

Don't be strangers - comment away, even if your comments are anonymous!

unh. 

i know i'm doing the right thing. i know i am.

it just sucks.

this is a creating-phase.

i am creating the life i want and need to live.

learning curve.

i'm going to go paint my nails and read textbooks.

a photographic post to come after my first photography lesson? oh yes!

.xox.

à bientôt

k

01.26. March 28, 2011

How I learned started to just let go

life throws curveballs. life also provides us with over-used clichés. 

I feel like writing, so bear with me here. 

This time last year...I truly can't remember where I was. I frequently find myself telling myself to remember where I am and what I am doing so that I can recall it a year later and remember precisely what I was doing.

mental journal I guess.

But this time last year, the end of March 2010, I barely can remember a thing. 

I was in a relationship.

I was in school (though the classes I took escape me now)

I lived in Winnipeg.

I worked at Eat!

Does the make up who I was and what I was doing? 

In front of me I have several photographs and greeting and post cards, all from the last year. 

But they provide me with no context. 

& I'm okay with that.

I moved to Montreal with equal amounts push and pull factors - I was leaving as much as I was heading towards. I am feeling myself morph into the semblance of who and what I want to be. Though I doubt I will, on March 28 2012, be able to re-iterate what I was doing one year prior. 

For the chapter in my life marked "montreal", I am blessed.

I have rediscovered myself. It's been found in unlikely places:

photographs

emails

post cards

a marketplace

a blog

nail polish

new music

french

walking

...

this list continues

I feel passion. curiosity. capability 

for everytime I felt - and said- "I can't", it's because I believed I couldn't.

But being somewhere new, there is no "I can't". I've taken more deep breaths here, metaphorically jumped into more metaphorical abysses here, and forced myself to be comfortable in redistribution, reformation.

My stated goals:

maintain a balanced relationship, with myself and my partner

find a more apt word than partner.

push myself to achieve something

accept that the itchiness to explore photography started when I was on a viarail train, Vancouver-bound, with a McDonald's camera, using it backwards thinking that that was how to zoom in, and finally do something about that itch: learn the camera. learn the art.

be confident in my opinions but open to change

Study for and complete the lsat.

Get charitable status for kwagala (reader, do YOU have that power? www.kwagalafoundation.com)

be honest, always

respond to emails, write more letters

graduate from my undergrad

feel beautiful

make others feel beautiful

be comfortable with the notion that i may never be the best at something, but that shouldn't prevent me from trying.

decorate the space around me in a way that I like, to encourage & inspire

listen to more music.

does anyone else have suggestions?

on a less self-reflecting note, I spent part of the weekend at Nicolas' parents' house for his mother's birthday. Saturday we were treated to some very French culinary delights. 

it started with potage du jour (a tomato-based broth, with a simple vegetable concoction)

then the main meal (which here is referred to as the plat principal...principeau?)

i had veal in a porto and pepper sauce, with a too-generous side of salad and thousand island dressing.

dessert was black forest cake (which I recognized from a Safeway bakery)

I must admit, I was a bit let down by the food, but the ambience and company were more than enough.

it also gave me the opportunity to wear (one of) my new floral print dress(es) and my 4-inch heels.

photos by me.

adorable kettle that always begins to boil when the fire goes on

front yard - screened in

swing-set-for-two

I never noticed all the old farm equipment around their place - this is their neighbour's yard

like the farm equipment, i never noticed how many flowers Pierette keeps either!

just some wood for the fire.

the dog: sherry

melted, condensed maple syrup on snow from outside. a home-made treat. 

soooo sweet.

real snow!

if we waited too long, the syrup hardened and became nearly impossible to eat.

I had to shower and brush my teeth twice after eating! it was so sticky! Pierette made it last night as dessert. Too bad the restaurant hasn't gotten around to preparing traditional Quebec desserts!

and that's all for now.

that's it?

that's it!

à bientôt

katie.